A Honeymoon A Go Go

Unless I get a chance to blog from my brother's house on Monday, which I will try to do, this may very well be my last blog post for a a while. I am off to my honeymoon with a quick pre-visit to my brother and Alex for a couple of days. And get this...I am not going to bring my MacBook to Puerto Plata. That is love. If Leon is ever doubtful of my feelings for him, he can look to that for reassurance.

I am excited to be going somewhere hot, but I find it really encouraging to also feel something the following: I am enjoying my life so much these days, that I almost wonder if I am going to 'miss' my home and my life here in The Jaw. For a wanderer like myself that is a strange and great feeling. Still, the one thing that I have missed these past three months is heat and that spurs me on. I would blog from the resort, but let's be honest, I am not going to have much to say. "Got up today, ate, tanned, swam, made love, napped, tanned, swam, ate, took a walk under the moonlight, fell even more madly in love, slept." Pretty blissful and pretty boring. That being said, I hope to do some fun and interesting things on the resort like snorkel for the first time and get a couple's massage right on the beach. Ahhhhhhhh, such a hard life.

Am leaving you all with a new KJ's Finds list ... full of links to great sites like my new, free, little temporary site for Live Out Loud Theatre or the online class that has been rockin' my heart or the place to buy tickets to the show that L and I are being contracted to do this summer. Lots of fun stuff...

Will also change my Konkin Question before I go...not sure what I am going to ask.

Send me safe-no-turbulence-great-weather-relaxing-bliss energy. I will be talking to you soon...

Or soon-ish.

There Was A Tree, And One Perfect Hill

Sometimes I am not sure if I am truly a 31 year old woman. Sometimes I am convinced that I have never grown up much beyond my 10 year old self. You see, I have a secret. A dirty and shameful secret. And like me and secrets, it must eventually be lived out loud. So here goes. I am going to let you in on something I do that nobody knows about.

I watch One Tree Hill. No, no. That isn't true. I don't just watch it. I obsess over it. I become so emotionally involved that I am an emotional wreck every time I finish an episode. I will spend hours searching for episodes online. It has even gotten so bad that I am watching fan videos of compiled scenes that lurk in the depths of YouTube. For those of you that know the show, even a little, I am a Leyton fan. (Leyton is fan lingo for the support of the union between Lucas and Peyton....I told you....It's like I'm a trekkie). I cheer those two on and growl at evil Dan when he scares me and giggle at Skills and hope to god that Hailey and Nathan figure out their dark times. As I type this, I see how exactly like a SOAP OPERA this show is and I hate soap operas. Yet, I love this show.

Tonight, I told my husband about my secret. Partly, he laughed, but mostly he understood. He summed it up beautifully. He said that these shows reel me in because they are epic love stories and speak of the kind of love that doesn't end...CAN'T end. For someone with abandonment issues, that is a very seductive thing. He's right. I want to believe that there is the possibility of falling in love with a person that becomes so much a part of your essence that your feelings for them never have an ending. They might morph a bit, but ultimately the love you feel for them just IS. Like the Sondheim lyric "loving you is not a choice, it's who I am".

Sounds a bit like the spiritual journey that many of us are on. Oh, to find that Love that is unchanging and ever present. Oh, to find that Love that Just Is.

So there it is. I am 31 and I am committed to One Tree Hill. Out of the closet. It holds a big place in my heart that few TV shows have competed for...and there is only one TV show that kicks OTH's ass...

That one starts with an F and ends in a Y and if you don't know the middle then you don't really know me.

Sitting Around In My Husband's Shirt

Ah, post-event bliss. I am married and I must tell you, I don't feel any differently. The titles are strange, sure, but the feeling is identical. Grateful for the best partner on earth, happily puttering around my little house, negotiating contracts for my business. The only moment of poopiness I have had was the other day when within 24 hours I found out that two people that I have known have become, for lack of a better word, famous. Malin Ackerman - who I just saw in 27 Dresses and is in the new Ben Stiller movie - is someone I know. It didn't even occur to me, until later, that the blonde I was watching on the screen was the same blonde 17 year old whose apartment I hung out at in Toronto back in 2001, 2002. I know her through Leanne who worked with her mother, yadda yadda yadda.

Then, that night I was googling something unrelated when I stumbled upon this year's Juno nominees and saw Suzie McNeil was nominated. It took me a second and then I stopped and realized this was SUZIE MCNEIL, the girl I went to Sheridan College with for part of the first year in 1996. I liked Suzie back then...she was always kind of a bad ass and didn't fit into our squeaky clean Music Theatre College, thus dropping out and going her own way. Now, after winning that REM Rock Star reality TV show, her career has taken off. In fact, one of her songs is going to be the theme song for the 2010 Olympics!

These are the moments when my simple little happiness seems sorta pathetic. I immediately feel defeated that I have not done anything as significant as these women and it makes me want to eat a bag of Doritos. Hey, I am just being honest. Getting away this weekend to Saskatoon helped. Buddies, successful auditions, a trip to the Centre for Positive Living and being registered all lifted my spirits. And today, I must shosholoza. I have business cards to design and a meeting tonight in Regina to nail down this summer show here in Moose Jaw.

I will add a link on here for our registry in case anyone is dying to get us a gift. It was distressing how expensive everything was, so feel free to ignore it or compile a group of ten people to buy one thing. Right now, there is only a Sear's link, but we are also going to register at Canadian Tire (we are renovating!!) and I will add that in a few days...

CLICK HERE FOR OUR SEARS REGISTRY

KJ and Leon Say I Do

For those of you that couldn't be there, but wish you had been...the day was perfect and I have saved a little chunk of the perfection for you, here...



Can't see the vlog?? You will need Quicktime to view this...if you need to download it for free, please click here for Windows users and click here for Mac users.

The Night Before - A Vlog

Take a visit inside my head, the night before my wedding...



Can't see the vlog?? You will need Quicktime to view this...if you need to download it for free, please click here for Windows users and click here for Mac users.

In Case You Were Worried

In a few minutes, I intend to go into my sweet, zen bathroom and run myself a steaming hot bath. But before I do, I want to say this, to anyone who might be wondering:

I am profoundly happy. There is not a doubt in all of my being that I am marrying the right guy. This isn't a marriage of convenience and it isn't a marriage born of settling - this is one of those unions of crazy, mad love. The two of us have dove into this head first and, some might say, very quickly, but there has never been two people more cocky that they are going to be the greatest love story ever told. We make awful money and are overly sensitive and messily passionate. I am still etching out my place in this world and he can barely remember what month we are in half the time - we are a wreck and we are giddy about it! If we fail, which I doubt we will, we will fail with huge fireworks and only after walking through hell and fire together. Other than a few, short lived, moments of reckoning which I must admit I have had, I am not afraid.

The best part is, other than the fact that I am marrying my soul mate, I get to walk down the aisle with my best friend. No, not Leon (although a better friend I could not find)...I am talking about myself. With Jo I lost myself and with my other loves I was only half of myself...but in this partnership I have become the Biggest and Best Version of Myself and have fallin' back in love with my life. Me and Me can do this thing called Wife...or Business Owner or Daughter or Artist or maybe even one day Mother...but most importantly, through it all and no matter what happens, We have each other. And on Tuesday I celebrate that as much as anything else.

Now, I am going to have a bath. Please have no reservations for me as I am sure you do not. If there are any regrets it is that I am going through all of this wonderful Life Stuff without My 404 Gang and other beloved friends by my side. And knowing me I will shed a small tear for the single, multi-boy life I am leaving behind;-)

But that is just so me. I have always been a sucker for nostalgia.

Hot steamy water awaiting...

The Almost Blog - #1

[The following is the first excerpt for a blog that I initially started to have produced in the local paper's web-paper. I wrote about three posts and then stopped when I didn't hear back from the editor. They make me laugh, though, and so I thought I would share them over the next few days. The blog was in entitled Two Actors, One House and a City Called Moose Jaw. Enjoy...]




We have our answer down pat.

Since moving to Moose Jaw from Vancouver not even a month ago there has been one question that has been asked by everybody. "What brings you to Moose Jaw?" is the inevitable question that comes once we have been asked "You folks from around here?" At first, floored by the overwhelming friendliness of the business owners and service people populating this small city, my partner, Leon, and I would launch into a long winded explanation of the miraculous events that had us packing up our west coast lives to move to Saskatchewan. But soon, oh so soon, our answer was whittled down - for the sanity of all involved. Now, when some curious Moose Jaw-vian wonders what would possess two Vancouver Musical Theatre actors to move to a rural city where there are far more parkas than feather boas and a Tim Hortons instead of a Starbucks, we simply state the truth.

Affordable housing in a growing market.

Too complicated to explain that I am not really new as I was raised here, leaving at eighteen to attend theatre school and pursue the stage. Ridiculous to start telling the story of how, while on contract here in the fall, we decided to try and get pre-approved just to see if we could (actors and mortgages don't usually go hand in hand). How, once we passed that first hurdle, the situation unfolded like a set of dominos and we found ourselves the owners of a house we never expected to buy. And although it does bring big laughs, it was extraneous to amuse the inquisitive with tales of how Leon bought the house during Saskatchewan's warm spell in October and is only now finding out what living through a prairie winter is all about.

For now, we have come to build equity. While we stay we hope to further our creative careers and refrain from losing our extremities to frostbite. We'll do the things we couldn't do as easily in Vancouver; namely accomplish 42 errands in under an hour and pay a house mortgage on an artist's income. Leaving our smirking theatre friends behind in Vancouver and Toronto, we feel like pioneers out here, choosing a road less taken. And a beautiful road it is...

even if it is flat and covered in 3 feet of snow.

The Random Babble

I am in one of those moods to just babble about several things unrelated and nothing quite at all. If you are in a mood presently for structure and compositional grace, then you might be best to skip this post and grab a cheeseburger or take a long bath.

We have wood lice. Now, after being a victim (or the grand manifestor) of bedbugs, most other kinds of bugs seem harmless. These little guys don't bite or ruin your home, they just like damp wood which it seems we have. However, it seems that no matter where I run I am never going to escape bug drama. So be it.

March 1st and it is mild again outside. There has been a chinook like mildness that has swept through this city over the last week or so. Thus the melting, thus the wet wood, thus the wood lice. But also thus the boosted spirits of myself and most everyone around me. It makes life easier and allows me to wear the cuter, fall jackets hanging in my closet. Add to this our new furnace and our home is positively toasty. Last night I even removed clothing when I went to bed instead of adding more layers. The summer here is going to be positively hot.

Inspired the other day, I begged Leon to help me rip out the run in the front room. These are perks of owning. If you feel like ripping, you rip. So we did and HALLELUJAH did we find a treasure. Original fir floors in great condition which a wonderful warm stain.





My cute future husband with his almost plumber bum. Oooo, but I love that floor. Of course we will have to sand all the floors now and restain them similarly to become uniform, but I shiver at how much value those floors are going to add to our home's value.

I asked L the other night, what would happen if we could sell our house for double what we purchased it for this fall. I am looking at rising real estate prices and noting the improvements that are occurring in our house and I don't think that selling the house we bought for 65K for 130K is totally impossible. 2008 is supposed to be the height of this boom, so if we can sell at the peak, we will make good money. I would want to move back to BC. There are homes in Nanaimo that parallel housing costs in Saskatoon, so going back isn't financially irresponsible. Plus, I miss it. I know I have only been here for two months, but I miss the smell of the damp air. Leon feels that if we don't even end up staying here for year, he will have missed out on something intangible. I guess we'll just keep renovating and see.

I am getting married in 10 days. Bizarre.

Pretty sure I am going to be naming my business Live Out Loud Theatre Productions and Services (shortening it to Live Out Loud Theatre or Live Out Loud Productions in common use of course). Seems to be everyone's favorite and the most connected to a branding of myself that I can come to. Thanks to everyone for your input. Will have to think of a new Konkin Question now.

The bottoms of my feet have been hurting. Just in one specific spot. Oh, and from tearing up the carpet, my old Chemainus injury (good ol' hamstring) has been aching again. Some days I feel that being 31 is infinitely old.

Lastly, I leave you with a picture of my beloved mother on her last day of work. She is donning the old nurses hat and everything. I am very proud of you mom. Now go take up belly dancing or something equally as shocking. Life's too short not to be shocking!